Happy Easter

Well, as I sat trying to think of something inspiring to say for Easter.  However, I think the cold medicine is taking it's toll as well as my love of studying other religions.  There are so many ties to Pagan spring celebrations...but that's a soap box for another time.

So, all I'll say is this:

Rejoice!  For he has risen!!  He died for our sins so we can return to our Heavenly Parents again someday.

Oh, and as it's always been, he's your brother and he loves you exactly the way you are.  He's your number one fan...though some people would make you believe he's not.

So, I hope everyone had a wonderful day!

<3

Jessie

What If God Was One Of Us?

Yup, another song blog. Sorry, you're going to get these more often than not!

I heard a song today I haven't heard in AGES!  Joan Osborne's What if God was One of Us?

Here's the lyrics, they're quite amazing:

If God had a name what would it be? 
And would you call it to his face? 
If you were faced with him 
In all his glory 
What would you ask if you had just one question? 

And yeah, yeah, God he is great 
Yeah, yeah, God he is good 
Yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah 

What if God was one of us? 
Just a slob like one of us 
Just a stranger on the bus 
Trying to make his way home 

If God had a face what would it look like? 
And would you wanna to see 
If seeing meant that 
You would have to believe 
In things like heaven and in Jesus and the saints 
And all the prophets 

And yeah, yeah, God he is great 
Yeah, yeah, God he is good 
Yeah, yeah, yeah-yeah-yeah 

What if God was one of us? 
Just a slob like one of us 
Just a stranger on the bus 
Trying to make his way home 

Just trying to make his way home 
Like a holy rolling stone 
Back up to heaven all alone 
Just trying to make his way home 
Nobody calling on the phone 
Except the Pope maybe in Rome.

I have always loved this song because in the LDS Faith, we are taught that we are all Children of God.  Which means, we are, by birthright, Gods and Goddesses of are own accord.  So, if God had a name, if he had a face?  Guess what, that's me, that's you, that's everyone.

So, what if God was one of us?  He IS us!

I hope with this new spin, we might find more love in each other and not so much hate.  Cause hate really sucks.

Love you all!!!!

Jessie

Hold On, Hold On To Yourself, For This Is Going To Hurt Like Hell

I am a song writer, a poet, an all around musician.  So, I can't help but see my life in the lyrics of a song.

I am going through my e-mails, sipping on a coconut herbal tea, and have my iPod on shuffle.

I have in the last few days been thinking about officially coming out to EVERYONE.  But, I'm having doubts.  Mainly with my family.  And it's not that they don't support me, they do.  I'm worried about what they'll be put through over my decision to not just keep this among the few that know.  It's very sad.  I feel more open than I ever have.  If anyone comes up and asks me if I am bi, I tell them, "yes, I am." But that has only happened on rare occasion.  More often than not, I go running back to my closet whenever it is convenient.  It is still a little bit unnerving to think about: I am a very open and honest person...but I'm still not completely open and honest.

I am okay with repercussions of my actions, but am I forcing my family to deal with it too?

I worry about my husband, will this make him think I love him less?  When/if people ask him, what will he say?

My kids, while they're still young, my son is old enough to ask why he sees girls kissing each other or holding hands...this is not his fight.

My mom.  She already gets flack from a few of my cousins about my "life choices".  Namely my tattoo, some odd notion that I've gotten drunk before, and don't think I have good friends that I hang around.  She has enough going on to deal with anymore stress caused by my "actions" no matter how they're looked at.

Another thing, my two sister-in-laws know I am Bi and are awesome about it.  My mother-in-law?  I don't think she knows, she's the kind to confront me on something like that.  But she is anti-gay.  From comments she's made in passing, I don't know how she'll take me being Bi.

I have asked a very small group of friends and family for wisdom.  While it was full of amazing pearls, the main theme was, "When it's the right time, you'll know...and girl, we've got your back!"

So, this song that just came on was "Hold On" by Sarah McLachlan.  I have stated before, she is one of my favorite singers.  She is just brilliant!  Well, the song is about her pleading to God about a male lover who is dying.

Some of the lyrics tonight, took on new meaning for me:

Hold on, hold on to yourself,
for this is going to hurt like hell
Hold on, hold on to yourself
You know that only time will tell
What is it in me that refuses to believe
This isn't easier than the real thing?
Am I in heaven here, or am I in hell?
At the crossroads I am standing

Wow.  Very powerful tonight indeed.  I think I found my answer.  I shall stay at the crossroads a bit longer waiting for the right time for me.  It's not the right time for everyone, we all have our  own times where we find our voice, and we do, we will shine brighter than anything else at that moment. For we are all Sunbeams.

So, for now, I shall remain to y'all as the lovely "Jessie".  I hope one day to have the courage of countless others to say, "Yup, I am, so what, deal with it."

Love to all,

Jessie

Big Day Today!

First of all, so sorry it's been a while! My dear Grandma died and then we had surgeries, sickness and a snowboarding accident.  I sprained my ribs while going down the bunny hill. I was so mortified! Gasping for air, laying there as 3 year olds roll past me. The only saving grace? They over-waxed my board! So, now I don't feel so horrible!

But, I digress!

There are two reasons that today is a big day!

First, the Supreme Court is hearing the California Prop 8 issue. This is a major issue about gay rights in the U.S.  If we win, there will be a wonderful step in the right direction for gays in this country. If we lose, well, we'll keep on fighting!

The other big day part is, I finally put up on my own personal page that I'm for equal rights for gays; both marriage and other wise.

Being LDS, support of these rights are like the tattoo I have on my back  Not against the law, but not really spoken about..

So, that's about it for right now! I will do an update soon!

Until then, my lovelies, stay strong and know you are so loved!

Jessie